Dishonored

Honor... this word has been the drive of many wars, pilgrimages, journeys, fights, and many books. For some it is the soul reason for life. Because in life, you have a chance to gain honor, to keep honor, and to show honor. For the Japanese, honor was held to be so important, that if you dishonored yourself, you dishonored your family, and the only way you could regain it was to kill yourself in ritual suicide.
The question for our generation is, does honor still exist today within our age group. One may look so far as into the military, and say it is still there. But if that person were to look deep into it, they would see that even in our great military, honor is scarce to find, and even scarcer to be created. True, that person will find valor, strength, and even to some point dignity. But, the truth is... in our military today, most value sex, alcohol, money, and self gratification more that honor, and rarely do they understand the difference.
For a man who loves honor, but lacks it in himself to show that he has anymore; the military can be a harsh and dreadful place to go to rebuild himself, and his integrity. When every corner you turn towards in search of yourself, you see demons and pain rather than light and truth... it is near impossible for a man to regain his stature there. The heart of an honest and honorable man can be turned cold in a place such as that. It would take more than the man himself to correct himself, and reestablish himself on the correct path.
To those who seek to be honorable, and who wish to serve others and God with their lives, the military is not the best course in which to set your life in. Instead, turn your eyes to God, ask for his guidance in your quest for honor. The US military is no longer what it once was. Take it from a man who is in the youngest of the forces, who on a daily basis sees the corruption in the eyes of members from all branches. It is enough to bring a man to tears to see that he made the wrong choice for his life, and to see the consequences of his actions. Don't get me wrong, this is a great life for those of you who desire to have a stable job, no worries, and the respect of others. The time away from home is tough, but only a matter of time. The pains of war, are for those who have done wrong, and know not that God is in control, and that it was in the service of their nation, and their for in the politicians hands.
But if you desire honor, to be honorable, to live an honorable life, then I suggest that you either keep your head high, and not befriend 99% of the men in this field, or serve in the name of honor in a different way. Or you may find yourself like me, in ripping your heart and soul out because you have no one to talk to to, no one who believes in the honor you do, no one to share your cause with.....no one who respects the man you are trying to become to make up for the man you have been. My advice to my brothers and sisters, don't make my mistakes.....and stay proud of who you are. If you can do that and be in the military, I applause you, and knee my knees before you.

Islamic Flies

flies, they are annoying little creatures that eat at the dead skin on your flesh, the garbage in you can, the crap on your lawn, the candy that has melted into your vehicles upholstery. No matter where you are, they tend to follow us around like stink follows your waste to the depths of hell and beyond. unless you decide to move to the North or South pole, you will never escape the ravage beasts, never. The best one can do is to grab a fly swatter, and take up the are of fly fencing, or become a crack shot with blow darts, as in the Disney movie jungle to Jungle. but for us here in the Middle Eastern deserts, we have it worst. For the flies here are like none other on the planet. See here, we have Islamic flies. They pray to Allah, and they feed on human flesh. These flies have the ability to fly faster, bite harder, and stay alive better then any other fly I know of. They wear their turbines proudly, as they make suicide bombing runs towards your scalp...yet they do not die...they live. Even if you manage to wack one, they come back. see, the flies don't have the 40 virgins awaiting them in the after life, no. Theirs is a much lesser a prize....40 heaping cans of garbage.....and when you take into retrospect the size of a fly....those cans will last darn near an eternity. what we need here, are USA Dragon Fly bombers to come in a devour our foes......because I cant take much more of these red bite marks cause by the little pestilence.
I retrack my statement I made before. I deleted it due to a good friends words....he is a wiser man than I in many ways. Some should listen more to what he has to say. Besides, who the heck do you think he is.

The Land of Sand, Wind, and Scars

As we got off the plane and onto the bus, it hit me how different this part of the world is, and yet how much the same it it. As some of you know, I am in the middle east as of a little while back. The plane ride was incredibly long, and extremely boring...but, it gave so much time to think and to reflect on who and what i am and should be.
After we got off the plane, I looked up to the stars, and to the moon to see what they look like with know trees to obscure their beauty. i was disappointed to find that, though there may be no tree to block my view, there was a wall of dust, making the moon look blured, and only a few stars visible. This haze has lasted the intire time I have been here, and it is quite depressing, seeing how the sun is down by 6pm here.
The wind constantly blows here, it never stops. The only relief you get is either in a building, or behind one. it kicks up dust, and constantly keeps your throat dry, and miserable.

Besides all this, this land is scared beyond belief. From events such as war, to natural disaster, it is torn and beaten. There are remains of bunkers being destroyed by our bombs(These bunkers were built with a guarantee of not being able to be destroyed, unless by US Bombs, where as the guarantee is forfeit). But that is reasonable, considering we saved them from the wrath of Sodom. But that isn't the least of it. You know how so many people preach on the news as to how America produces the most polution, and how we trash our lands.....well the tree huggin fools need to come to this place, the only clean place here is on our bases. Go off the base, and there is trash on almost every single square foot of land. How about they go fix the parts of the world that need fixing, before they get onto the nation who is actually doing somthing to prevent polution. And yes, we are the leaders in the anti polution revolution....maybe not as far as cars go, but in water treatment, nature preservation(Haven't they heard of the Nation Forests, or Nature Preservation areas....hmmmm........)

Any ways, thats it for my rant for this post.
-Andrew Lee
Transient Adventurist

Who the heck do you think I am

That's right, I said it, Who the Heck do you think I am?

I'll tell you who I am, I'm me......a transient fool......meaning I never stay in one place for long....because home to me is where my heart is. i go where life takes me, and follow my dreams. That's right, I am a wonderer.

How did I become this way, I watched way to much TV growing up, and fell in love with adventure and romance. Yes ladies, my favorite movie is Sleepless in Seattle, followed by Cast Away.
I'm going to conquer my dreams, and so should you.

To quote a show my good ole buddy Super paul made me watch....
"Believe in you. Don't believe in the you who believes in me who believes in you, believe in you who believes in himself." Thats right, believe in yourself. Point that fingure high, and claim the world as your playground. Defy all laws of physics.... Believe, have faith my friends, and conquer the stars.....For your dreams, are the dreams that will pierce the heavens.

Peering

Peering into ones soul is a daunting and often frightening task. To see what you've always wished, and always feared to see at the same time. In one hand you have the good, the things in your life that make you proud to be who you are, and in the other, those things that would bring you tears...knowing what you have done. The human soul and mind are both amazing creations, we have both the ability to see right and wrong, and to choose which we will follow and make our own. But, at the same time, the ability to remember and the ability to understand what your actions cause and create, often fell as if they are to much to bear.
The weights of life can sometimes be a heavy burden upon our hearts and our bodies. For the past several years this has been all to true for me. I have allowed my heart to be hardened by the events in my life, and I have allowed myself to become bitter. Is this struggle, I have placed so much guilt and hate into my soul, that it became to disgusting for me to even pear into. So, I stopped peering into it....and allowed all this darkness to consume me....in a sense killing the very person I had worked so hard to become. People who knew me before this change, saw it in me when I was with my ex fiance, but I ignored them, and instead rushed forward into this dark pit of despair and hate I had dug for myself.
It has taken me almost 2 years now to see the complete error of my ways, and accept the fact that I have been forgiven and so I must also forgive. This isn't a hallmark moment that brought me to tears, nor did it rekindal old relationships. In fact, this realizations very being has probably destroyed what would have been a wonderful relationship with some one who is very dear to me, but whom I can barely manage a friendship with now. It isn't something I regret, but more something I accept with open arms. I know who I am, and I see my soul for what it is, filth and all, and I accept the consequences for my actions. But, I will no longer dwell on the past. God has presented me with the chance to reclaim my place in life, as I had originally intended to be. I am back on the path that I should have been on all along.
It is a true beauty to see into your own soul, and to no longer attempt to peer into others. It has taken me 5 years in all to finally see my own self, and to mold my own soul rather than allowing others to mold me, as I attempted to mold my life to meet tiers, and to also mold their hearts, after my own selfish direction.

The Prodical sons return

For the past few weeks I have been fighting with the essence of who I am. Inside it's felt like there were three different combinations of myself, fighting to gain control over the domination person that makes me who I am. But, I have finally chosen who I am, and who I am going to be. It's as a wise friend of mine, named Paul said-
"You are who you act to be, act as the person you want to be, and you will become that person. I was given the nick name "Super Paul", because I worked so hard. I made my self believe it, by doing it. I acted like Super Paul, and I became him.....now I'm the hardest worker my boss has, at least as far as ground workers go."
Paul was right, I watched him become that. And now, it's time I decide who I am, and now i know who I will be. I'm not going to say what it is now, because I want to see people seeing me change, and I want them to judge me for that person, as i become him. The transformation into Andrew Lee, the person I want to be....the person I always made myself out to be as a younger child.....
On another note, I decided how I am going to do school. I decided to go to Tulsa Community College for one more semester when I get home, so that I don't have to rush into getting a home to stay in, nor will I have to worry about getting home at a later time.
But for Now, I will leave you all with these words.....
"When once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you will always long to return." -- Leonardo da Vinci

The Sooner the Cowboy, the greater the flight?

Lately I have been trying to choose which path way I should take to my ultimate goal of flight and graduation from this eternal servitude ever so often referred to as college. See, if i go one way, there is a larger variety of aircraft to learn in and from. But, on the flip side, there are orange colored aircraft piloted by cowboys, and there aren't so many. One is cheaper then the other, but one has better facilities, the cheaper has less job opportunities and less of a housing district, while the more costly has plenty of job and intern opportunities, and plenty of places to live. There in lies my problem, see...I want to room with one of my best friends while I am there, but at the same time, I need to be able to have a job, and a fairly decent place to live. I don't know if I could handle living with 2 other people besides us, and on top of that, I don't know how much more security or PI work I can stand to do...... It's making me feel old, look old, and feel worthless. I like both of the colleges, but I don't know if I can get this friend to go to the other. I'm in need of divine intervention. So, I ask the question, is it to Soon to be a Cowboy, or is Sooner better then later, at least when it comes to land runs.

http://aviation2.okstate.edu/
http://www.aviation.ou.edu/about.html

-Andrew Lee

The Wind Sand and Star

"I fly because it releases my mind from the tyranny of petty things . . ." -- Antoine de St-Exupery

To the many of my friends who will not see me again for the many months to come, I start this new space, to share my thoughts and the dwellings of my minds inner being. I am heading to the lands of wind, sand, and stars to discover the beauties of human life, and the working of my own soul. to those of you who knew me before, I am earning my wings, and about to take flight into the wild blue yonder of this wonderful thing called life. It is time to sore, and possibly upon this flight I may open my eyes, and see the earth, and my life for what God always meant it to be.

"The airplane has unveiled for us the true face of the earth." -- Antoine de St-Exup?ry, 'Wind, Sand, and Stars,' 1939.

-Andrew Lee aka Jason Harwood